The big break

 https://youtu.be/rexeYSFj6Fg?si=U-1v3RDShKP6AmS1


All my life, I've struggled with belonging, whether it was to a place or to someone and I've always felt like I was bigger than any place, I've never felt contained and I was always restless, chasing something I don't even know until that one moment. The whole world was quiet, and I felt finally at peace like I've reached the finish line of a very long race, like wait! I don't need to hold my breath anymore!!I'm not gasping for air!! I'm a part of something bigger than me!! Hold on, I'm neither a loner nor alone!!!! I thought I'd never know what that is like. This moment was my long-awaited break from the constant state of being sympathetically alerted. I swear I could feel my cortisol sighing like, where have you been! I can finally wait, look around, take it all in, take a deep breath, feel something, let it all go, turn off my loud thoughts, put my brain on don't disturb mode, inject a hypnotic in my veins, smile uncontrollably, be overjoyed. 

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